Here’s the setup. I am happily watching “Ramsay’s kitchen nightmares” on the telly, when Gordon Ramsey start declining italian dishes. Felt like fingernails on a blackboard: Brushetta, Ghnokee, Taghliatelleee, Fettucceeneee.

Oy! Gordon! Noo! ohnoohnohno! You have almost 10 Michelin stars for your fine restaurants all over the world. Learn the jargon, Jimmee!

So, here’s a wee lesson. Let’s start with the basics:

- “Ch” in Italian is pronounced like a “k”. It’s brusketta and not brushetta. Mocha is moka.

- an “e” is always pronounced like in the spanish word “que”. Not “eeee”. It’s fettuccinay, not fettuccinee. Same for linguine.

- “gn” is like the spanish “ñ”. It is ñocchi and not ghnocchi.

- Get a reality check: you’ll never learn to say parmiggiano properly. Just call it Parmesan cheese. not parmejian, or however you pronounce that.

- Few words that english speaking people tend to use in a way that we find quite funny are “prosciutto”, “gelato” and “biscotti”. It’s like going to a buthcer and ask for “meat”. Yeah, right, but what kind/animal/cut? Prosciutto means ham, gelato means ice-cream and biscotti means cookies. Quite general and broad items, right?

What really craks me up is to go to the local starbucks (I know, sometimes it’s the only place to get coffe in longwood) and see how marketing works. Why is it that a “small coffee” is called “grande”? Grande means big. wtf? moccaccino, frappuccino, whatthefrackkino is all that crap?

Anyway, it’s late… I am talking crap, as usual. Need to feed the young one as his 23:00 bottle is approaching. Talk to yous later for some more rambling about coffee and maybe another receipe.

Tschuess

BRUSKETTA!!!! not brushetta… ‘cazozza, ma e’ cosi difficile da capire?